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About Photography / Student Evie ClarkFemale/United Kingdom Recent Activity
Deviant for 5 Months
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Newest Deviations

Pink Gradient Flowers by ThePhotographyPotato Pink Gradient Flowers :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 16 0 Early Bluebell by ThePhotographyPotato Early Bluebell :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 9 0 Daffodil by ThePhotographyPotato Daffodil :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 14 1
Literature
I'm Here
She needs help. I can see it.
She thinks she hides it. Thinks I can't tell. But I can.
It's been so clear for so long. We're inseparable. I've noticed all the little changes.
I see the pain that she tries to hide away. I see the mental struggle she fights everyday.
I notice the way she's grown quieter over the years. I see the way she sits on the sidelines. She's still sitting there but it's like her minds somewhere else. She's not completely present.
She observes. Listens. Makes a comment now and then but never really joins in.
I see the way she fakes laughs. Whenever everyone else does she joins in at the right times. But it never reaches her eyes. I see through it. You can't fake a laugh to someone who's faked it for so long.
She never talks about herself anymore. Never shares her feelings. Never tells us when she's upset. She listens to all of our problems. All of our rants about nothing. We pour our hearts out to her. She's the best listener. But I can tell there's so much on her
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Literature
Losing Reality
I kept my head down. Hid my face. Slipped into the shadows.
My skin prickled. I could feel stares burning into the back of my head. They were watching me. Judging me.
I pulled my hood on further and quickened my pace.
Ignore them.
I focused on my feet. Every step taking me closer to home. Closer to the safety of my bed. I could curl up and hide away from the world.
A laugh echoed through the wind. I snapped out of my thoughts.
I didn't dare look behind me. I didn't break my steady pace.
Ignore them.
I had to get the better of this.
The laugh gradually built up louder and louder. There was more of them now. Hysterical laughter surrounded me. It made my head hurt. I wanted it to stop.
I felt trapped. Like the air was tightening around me. I struggled to breath. I felt a surge of anxiety rise in my chest.
I had to get out of here. I couldn't ignore them anymore.
I broke into a panicked sprint. I desperately looked around trying to figure out where it was coming from.
I stopped in my track
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Dress Sketches by ThePhotographyPotato Dress Sketches :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 6 0 Steam Punk Dress Designs by ThePhotographyPotato Steam Punk Dress Designs :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 9 0 Fashion Sketches by ThePhotographyPotato Fashion Sketches :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 10 1 Curious Kitten by ThePhotographyPotato Curious Kitten :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 33 6 Ray of Sunshine by ThePhotographyPotato Ray of Sunshine :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 31 2 Flower by ThePhotographyPotato Flower :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 29 2
Literature
Self Defence
She puts on her armor.
A hardened shell to keep them out.
She pushes them away.
Her tongue is like a knife, lying in wait for someone to get too close.
She doesn't let anyone in. Doesn't let anyone see the pain beneath her anger.
She's hated. Avoided. Feared.
She figures that no one can hurt her if she doesn't let them in. If she hides away. She lashes out before they get the chance.
She has scars so deep nothing can heal them.
The ghosts of her past haunt her everywhere she goes.
She can't let time repeat itself. She won't make the same mistakes again.
But the truth is she's lonely. Deep down behind those high walls she's hurting.
Her heart yearns for someone to talk to. To share her pain. To take away the heavy burden she's been carrying for so long.
But she doesn't know how. She's hidden behind anger and hatred for so long she can't open up. She's too scared to let someone in for fear of getting hurt.
So instead of reaching out. Accepting their kind words and sympathetic looks. She
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Literature
Suffering in Silence
She smiles and laughs like us.
She dresses like us.
She jokes and chats like us.
She looks normal like us. She blends in perfectly.
But there's pain hidden behind those sharp, green eyes.
She suffers silently behind those high walls she's built. They keep everyone out. Push everyone who cares away. Everyone who can help her.
She hides her true self away. Locks it away deep down inside of herself. Watching the world from behind a glass screen. Behind a fake personality.
No one takes the time to ask if she's ok. No one looks behind her mask of fake happiness. They don't see past her fake smiles, They don't notice how it never reaches her eyes. They don't don't see the torture inside her head. She suffers alone.
Her mind is poisoned with evil emotions. Where others see a beautiful young girl, happy and youthful. She sees imperfections. Her eyes are clouded with self hatred.
She can't see the beauty in herself. She doesn't see the intelligent, kind, loved girl standing in the mirror.
Her m
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Pink Flower by ThePhotographyPotato Pink Flower :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 14 0 Lakeside Tree by ThePhotographyPotato Lakeside Tree :iconthephotographypotato:ThePhotographyPotato 23 4
Literature
Tired
I'm tired. So tired.
I can't do this anymore.
It's every night. When the lights go out. When there's nothing left to keep me busy. When my thoughts are the only thing to fill the black void of silence.
That's when the torture begins.
They wait until I'm alone. Vulnerable. Weak. When I have nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide.
They jeer at me. Belittle me. They tell me I deserve to feel pain. Suffering. That I don't deserve to live.
I've grown so used to it. I've learned to numb myself. Learned to put my defenses up. Keep them out.
But I haven't slept in so long. My walls are weakening. They're starting to escape through the cracks. Starting to claw away at my sanity. Tear down my confidence. Rip away my happiness. Slink into my thoughts. Poisoning my mind with self hatred, doubt, fear, shame, paranoia, anxiety.
I can't hear my voice anymore. They're shouting too loud. I'm losing myself. Sinking into a dark pit. Buried by their poisonous words. Trapped. Shut away from the world.
I try to sh
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Activity


Pink Gradient Flowers
I suck at identifying plants. If anyone knows what this is please comment bellow.
Let me know what you think. Feel free to leave constructive criticism.
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Early Bluebell
Another macro shot.
Saw a couple of early blooming bluebells and I couldn't resist taking a photo.
Let me know what you think. Feel free to leave constructive criticism.
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Daffodil
Sorry for not uploading for so long. I took a well needed break for my mental health but I'm back now.
I was playing around with macro mode today so I thought I'd post some of them.
Let me know what you think. Feel free to leave constructive criticism.
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She needs help. I can see it.
She thinks she hides it. Thinks I can't tell. But I can.
It's been so clear for so long. We're inseparable. I've noticed all the little changes.
I see the pain that she tries to hide away. I see the mental struggle she fights everyday.
I notice the way she's grown quieter over the years. I see the way she sits on the sidelines. She's still sitting there but it's like her minds somewhere else. She's not completely present.
She observes. Listens. Makes a comment now and then but never really joins in.
I see the way she fakes laughs. Whenever everyone else does she joins in at the right times. But it never reaches her eyes. I see through it. You can't fake a laugh to someone who's faked it for so long.
She never talks about herself anymore. Never shares her feelings. Never tells us when she's upset. She listens to all of our problems. All of our rants about nothing. We pour our hearts out to her. She's the best listener. But I can tell there's so much on her own mind. Built up over the years of suppressing it. No where to release it.
Most people think it's just her quiet personality. That she just doesn't like to talk. But I know better than that.
We grew up together. I remember when we were younger. She was always so happy. We used to play for hours together. Dress up like princesses. Play with our dolls. You never laughed much but I could always see it in your eyes. They had a certain sparkle. You could always tell when you were truly happy. But over time something changed. I can't remember the last time I saw that sparkle.
I know that something happened in the past. Someone hurt her. Not physically but mentally. Used her. Abused her. And left her to pick up the pieces. Toxic people do that. I know. I've met them.
Since then she's changed. She's grown more reserved. Second guesses herself. Follows the group instead of leading. Built up walls to protect herself from the same mistakes. Stopped opening up. Talking about how she really feels. Always plays the 'I'm fine' act. But she's not. I've had too much experience. I see past that.
I look back on our conversations. We have a habit of making jokes about ourselves. All the bad things. All our problems. We joke to hide the pain written underneath. We laugh it off. Act like everything's fine. Like it doesn't affect you. But I know how it feels. When you go home. You're alone. You think back to something that was said. Something that stuck with you. You couldn't get it out of your head. You knew it was nothing. Just a harmless joke. But it struck you the wrong way. I know how it feels to fixate on it. Start to question yourself. And I know what it's like when you go to bed. When the voices take a hold. And that harmless joke triggers something inside. Grows into something a lot more dangerous.
I've watched her drift further and further away. Watched the old her fade. Watched as invisible hands drag her down into a dark pit.
I've wanted to reach out to her so many times. Sit her down. Talk to her. Try to get her to open up. Before it's too late. Before she's too far out of reach. But I know  how hard that is. I know what it's like to be forced to talk. It will only push her further away. I know she has to be ready. It has to be her decision. She needs to come to me.
So instead I'll support her in whatever way I can. I'm always here to listen. Even if she just needs a hug. Someone to sit with her in silence. Someone to lean on. Whenever she's ready. Whatever she needs. I'll be there.
I'm Here
Olivia, I love you so much. Don't do anything stupid. 
I'm always here for you, whatever you need. And I always will be.Hug
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Jacksepticeye is doing a charity live stream to raise money for the dbsa (depression and bipolar support alliance)
Please go and watch and donate if you can.
#PositiveMentalAttitude
Hey Guys!

I have a quick story time of how I nearly died today. Now I'm a really clumsy and idiotic person so I have a lot of near death experiences but for once it wasn't my fault cause today I got a firework thrown at me. Yup...You read that right. I literally got a firework thrown at me.
On the way home some idiots from my school decided to throw a fire work or something else explosive across the road and it exploded literally an arms length in front of me and my friends.
I just heard the bang and thought it was a gun and then I saw the explosion and realized that it was a fucking firework. It scared the shit out of me! It was so fucking close to us it could have easily hit one of us.
Lord knows why they have fireworks in school or how they got them but I could have fucking died. You have your phones, your computers, your x boxes and playstations but you decide to play with a firework.
Who knows, they could have just been fucking around with them cause they're idiotic teenage boys or they could have been trying to kill us cause that shit came close. You never know.
My school is just such a lovely, friendly place to be. I'm so glad I chose to go there.

To add to this already amazing day I also discovered that I might have a stalker which is just fucking great.
While me and my friends were still recovering from nearly being killed by a firework, we decided to walk (I'm not gonna say her real name so I'm just gonna call her Molly) home like we do most days. But today some kids in her neighborhood were hanging about and as we walked by started shouting my name.
Now I don't remember ever meeting any of them before so I have no idea how the fuck they know what my name is. Me and my friends tried to ignore them as we walked past but they kept shouting after us so after a while I turned around and said hi to shut them up, before walking away.
We said bye to Molly and dropped her off at her house. Now the only problem was that me and (Let's call her Lola) had to walk back up the road and past the kids again.
Great...Just fucking great.
Me and Lola walked on the other side of the road and prayed that they wouldn't notice us. But no...Of course they did. They started shouting at me again but this time me and Lola just walked past as fast as we could, ignoring them as best we could.
And to put the icing on the cake as we were walking away we heard them saying that we were sexy which is just fucking creepy considering they somehow know my name when I don't remember ever seeing them before in my life.
So today's been a fucking amazing day but this is actually quite average for my shit life as I seem to be the unluckiest person ever.
If you want more storytimes like this let me know and I'd be interested to know if you've had any creepy or near death experiences so feel free to leave them in the comments.

That's all for now.
Bye! Evie xx

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ThePhotographyPotato
Evie Clark
Artist | Student | Photography
United Kingdom
I'm just a potato with a love for photography. And hamilton. Hamilton is my life.
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:iconmakkex:
Makkex Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2018
:lel: Thanks for the  Faved Sign  
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TheBohoCraftsShoppe Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2018   Artisan Crafter
Thank you very much for favoriting our crafts-work and for the +devwatch, hope you will enjoy our future creations! :heart:
Orange beaded brooch (available) by TheBohoCraftsShoppe Beaded orange hair fascinator (available) by TheBohoCraftsShoppe Beer cap peacock feather boutonniere [SOLD] by TheBohoCraftsShoppe Red flower baby headband (available) by TheBohoCraftsShoppe
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carrolsmith Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2018   Photographer
Thank you very much for the +fav +fav +fav +fav +fav +fav +fav +fav 
White Rose White Rose (Meaning: Innocence, Purity, Charm) -F2U- White Rose Bullet Blooming Waterlily White Rose (Meaning: Innocence, Purity, Charm) Misc Icon - 010 Rose White White Rose 
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Mavricot Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Many thanks for the recent +fav , much appreciated :) (Smile)
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Bermiro Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2018   Photographer
Many thanks for the +fav  Evie    Incredible beautiful sunset. by Bermiro        Hug 
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:iconmakkex:
Makkex Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2018
Happy Easter Thanks for the :+fav: revamp 
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:iconcarrolsmith:
carrolsmith Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2018   Photographer
Thank you kindly for the +fav +fav +fav +fav +fav +fav +fav +fav +fav 
Rose boquet 
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Bermiro Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2018   Photographer
Thanks for the +fav     I love the sunset. by Bermiro         =P (Razz) 
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UiritasFujoshi Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for the fav!! Okay - Lucy Fairy Tail 
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